Alphabetical stories

It's a Wonderful Life

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My wife is making lunch. I suggest leftover pizza. We are going over to the neighbor’s house for pizza tonight, my wife says. I tell her that’s okay. I like pizza.

It's All in the Interpretation

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a random sticker that says, Repent Sinner, and a club lineup snaking around the corner and sirens and that urine smell at alley's mouth

It's All in Your Head

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The terms of a broken heart, I guess I nevergot to read them. But they must besomething awful, something numbing, something no sane personwould ever agree to. You're already on the vergeof becoming nothing I can remember without a photograph beingshoved in my face. Like a…

It's Always the Quiet Ones

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I know this much: right now I’m over a thousand miles from my brother. I’ve been watching the odometers, adding it all up.

It's autumn

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Mum and Dad are dead, though I'm the only person who has noticed. They're sipping their tea in the kitchen. Dad keeps coughing up maggots. Mum's face looks like a cracked mirror: I see myself in it, broken, dark. My brothers carry on as normal. They huddle by the TV,…

It's End of the World Karaoke

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It’s End of the World Karaoke at Big Daddy’s and Lara takes a photo of herself for Facebook before she goes on stage. She’s holding a basket of nachos in one hand and her phone in the other. After she takes the photo, she says, to Javier, “Hold these,” an

It's Legal Here

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You may think it's illegal Well, you'd be wrong, ya hear? Cause you're just in the wrong Neck of the woods And it's legal here Want some beer? Yeah, that's right It's legal here Don't go opening the door Any wider, I know You don't

It's Like

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It’s like drawing with Cesium

It's Like That

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Like the term rogue cop

It's May. Enjoy Yourself!

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May is National Masturbation Month. How do I know? My pal Senior Sex Expert Joan Price is not only vigorously celebrating, but doing everything she can to spread the word.“I'm on it!” I assured her when she told me. “Thanks.”…

It's My Birthday

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and the President didn't call.

It's My Life

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Look, “Wolfie,” (or “Pharaoh,” or whatever your name is now) a little too much information, don’t you think? I don’t need to hear all the details about you and Sharon. It’s my life, and I’ll cry if I want to – to alter the song just a

It's Next Door

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The old lady from next door had been really quiet for the last few days.

It's Not Enough

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I'll never forget the way you tasted that last morning that I ever saw you.The blurry eyed look on my face as I searched your bed for my tshirt, and you in a hurry because you were already late for work bending down onto the bed and grabbing my chin the…

It's not heavenly light, b!*&#.

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He stopped believing in God when he learned how balls worked. Spermatocytes turned into spermatids and spermatids turned into spermatozoa, the transition taking place in tiny loop de loops called the seminiferous tubules which contain at least three…

It's Not Paranoia

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It's Not the Heat, it's the Humidity

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Maria Summer afternoon I love you I have good news The last day of school I long not to long Your eyes, absorbing not reflecting More like a garnet Not a ruby Thundergrowled danger Tinglethumb

It's Not Too Soon to Feel Crabby 'bout Christmas

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Call it Chanukkah, call it Kwanzaa Whatever the name, I just don’t wanzaa!

It's Only Natural

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I just like puppies, and slapping people.

It's Part of the Plan

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...and on the eighth day

It's really not the same

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It wasn't the same as taking a course with Ginsberg. Everyone knew Ginsberg. Nick Cave, too, everyone knew him. Waiting lists were full months in advance for those classes, everyone sent in resumes and writing samples, praying, begging to be included. Lish was just an…

It's Stupid, Stupid, What Will Become Of Us

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Whoa! Whoa! This just in! You mean we were minutes away from some kind of immanent Greek tragedy!!? Let me get this straight. I cheated one time on Jolene with Jolene’s baby-sitter (you!), whom she used to cheat on her husband (with me)? I guess I’m luc

It's the Great Conspiracy, Danny Brown

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Danny was only ten years old when he first met the man in the suit. His machine looked like a plotter and it was, sort of, but also something of a plot device.

It's the New Age of Bullshit

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They’re young and haughty. 27’s still a long ways off. They read about the famous, not the dead. Dusty dragonflies will not land upon them, and they are really only in love with the dishwasher. Now there’s a problem. Poetry is dead,

It's Tough

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got the space heater going in the desert got a lot of space out there somewhere

It's True What They Say

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Pa grasps my fingers, odd because he's never held my hand and he's dead ten years anyway.

Italy, 1990

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She...learned the ways of men, especially foreign men, who eyed her mother even as they passed around pictures of their children, wallet-bound photographs that included their reluctantly smiling wives.

Itch

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Clayton had a grin like the hand of a beast that stretched as long as her gravel road...

It’s a compromising situation...

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It’s a compromising situation... The would be Bride of Christ begins perspiring before the crowd. Jesu, Joy of Man’s Desiring echoes through the antique church just one more time, a little loud. With every added verse and every flickering vigi

it’s a true story

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My only celebrity anecdote involves seeing Barbara Bush in the back of the Presidential limo ...