Grapple
I am a bomb but I mean you no harm.
That I still am here to tell this, is a miracle: I was deployed on May 15, 1957, but I didn't go off because a British nuclear engineer, a young father, developed qualms after seeing pictures of native children marveling at the mushrooms in the sky, and sabotaged me. I could see why during that short drop before I hit the atoll: the island looks like god's knuckles in a bathtub, the ocean is beautifully translucent, corals glow underwater, a dead city of bones, allowing a glimpse into a white netherworld. I met the water and fell a few feet into a chromatic cemetery.
The longer I lie here, listening to my still functioning electronic innards, the more afraid I grow of detonating after all this time. I don't share your gods, but I pray I shall die a silent death.
Merry Christmas to you all.
|
14
favs |
302 views
32 comments |
160 words
All rights reserved. |
Author's Note
this is part of my unpublished story 'faces' - cameos of 24 time zones on christmas day. the title of this piece comes from the code name of the 1st british hydrogen bomb programme.
my (usual) recitation is at http://bit.ly/d5WJmt
you can read first drafts of other pieces at http://bit.ly/5s359f
Other stories by Finnegan Flawnt
Tags
Groups
-
10+ Favs
Public group71 members -
People who like to flash
Public group133 members
Love that imagethought (you know which one).
"gkiab," to clarify.
Love the way the creations and myths of gods and men share an uneasy berth in this piece. Lots to savour in so few words.
thanks matt and carol! ('uneasy berth' - so fittingly tagged, i love it)
#$(*@!~* What an amazing opening, Finnegan. And it doesn't let up for me.
Amazing, Finnegan. Just fabulous. What a POV! A fave, for sure.
Whew! Lotsa story here that is so concisely put and yet with powerful imagery. Nice work.
Very nice, especially describing the islands as god's knuckles. What a perfect image.
Packs a powerful punch ... Silent but deadly.
Quietly menacing... Yet another great excerpt from 'Faces'
Really cool perspective
the poetic hits the ethical, a lovely story of nonviolence that would make dr king proud.
"god's knuckles in a bathtub!!" great words!
there is beautiful rhythm and rhyme in this piece. "beautifully translucent" i do not understand "chromatic cemetery" something very eery in end. all done in short time. last line feels either ominous or not needed to me--
Finnegan,
My apologies for all. I read just now why the line about Christmas was there.
The recording of you reciting this piece is absolutely fantastic!
Thank you this, Finnegan!
Bravo!
thanks y'all!. bobbi: 'chromatic' as in 'colorful', referring to one side of the underwater world apart from the white corals. perhaps too confusing but that is my favourite line!
You're good! I am with Sam on the "amazing opening."
'chromatic' provides a life-affirming negation in a splendor of varietal scale of the unmentioned, though intimated white light that would accompany the incident of detonation
nice
Superb. '...the island looks like god's knuckles in a bathtub' - this stands out but it struggles to do so because everything else around it is so very good.
powerful! Those were the years.
All good, especially within the larger collection
this is incredibly strong. "god's knuckles" indeed. i read "chromatic" as a chromatic scale, which is dissonant when played.
Finally, we hear what the bomb has to say! Lots of great details and excellent use of word economy. Great!
This is the real stuff.Like god's knuckles in a bathtub. People spend their whole lives looking for a line like that. Fave!
i appreciate your read, as always: i like that 'chromatic' played several tunes on your interpretative harps. gives me strength to finish the collection and submit it.
Wonderful idea, beautifully rendered with a punch. Good work.
I agree with D.P. Nice work Finnegan!
Nice work, Finnegan! I'm glad I discovered you.
thanks kim, michael, hobie - glad to have been discovered, too.
the god's knuckles stands out the most to me but yeah everything about this is wonderful
may have to go watch dr. strangelove again
Wow. Incredibly well done. What a big punch in such a small space.
heh - if anything would stand out, it's god's knuckles. thanks guys. "dr strangelove" - thanks for making me think of that - brings on an acute attack of sellers deficiency disease...
A hear-wrenching and amazing story in so few words.
Bomb is don.