Day Late, Dollar Short

ME: I've requested that your office stop sending statements each of the last three months.

BILL COLLECTOR: Sir, your account shows an outstanding balance and needs to be paid in full.

ME: Let's go through this one more time, the account holder, my grandmother is deceased. Dead people don't pay medical bills.

BILL COLLECTOR: Sir, if the outstanding balance is not paid in full our hands will be forced to report this to an outside collection agency.

ME: Who are you going to report? My dead grandmother?

BILL COLLECTOR: We will report you if these bills are not paid in full.

ME: Really? That's funny considering that I am neither the spouse of the deceased or executor of any estate.

BILL COLLECTOR: Pardon?

ME: Since I kept receiving statements, I thought it would be smart to contact an attorney to see if myself or anyone in my family were liable for the bills. Know what they said? 
 
BILL COLLECTOR: Silence
 
ME: They said...that any agency who tried to manipulate me into paying it was actually breaking the law.

BILL COLLECTOR: Silence

ME: Can I get your name and contact information for my records?

BILL COLLECTOR: There seems to have been a misunderstanding, we will be sure remove this file from our outstanding accounts list.

ME: Your name?

BILL COLLECTOR: Thank you sir, have a good day. Click